Heather

This is Heather & me on Homecoming Night in 1990. We had been best friends for two short years at this time, but it may as well have been a million for the bond we shared. She knows this, but maybe she's forgotten - Heather was an answer to my prayer. If there ever is a time when I lack faith, all I have to do is think of the time before she came into my life, the prayer I had been praying for years and I remember that there is a God and He loves me very much.

Her family moved next door to me at the beginning of my freshman year. I caught glimpses of her walking to the bus stop, but I was too shy to introduce myself. One day we started talking. I don't remember why or how, but Heather does. All I remember was that I loved her from the beginning!

I have a tendency to be unheard. WHAT? It's true. I think so many things in my head that I don't share with other people. At fourteen, I was just beginning to feel frustration about not being heard. I was really fed up with people always telling me how I felt. I was very angry that none of my friends seemed to love me as much as I loved them. I felt very much like a teenager! What better way is there to describe it? A dark side to those frustrated, angry, forgotten feelings is death. I wanted to die. I didn't want to die, but I began to believe that I rather die than continue a life where I would never be heard. I was suffocating! I prayed and prayed and prayed for a friend who would listen without dismissing me. I longed for a confidant who trusted and treasured me for who I was. I wished for a friend who would laugh as hard as I did without calling me names or being hurtful. I longed to be loved only the way a best friend can love. In walked Heather ...

I've just read a book called The Help. One aspect I loved about it is the friendship between two women. They are narrating their feelings and are very honest about the warmth they feel for one another as well as the truth they know about their friend. I have silly, annoying characteristics about me. Heather is perfect, but if she were to have any imperfect qualities, I feel I would look at them objectively. There is a point in a relationship where you see the warts, but still reach for the hand. When what you get out of the friendship is much more important and precious - much more comforting than any negative could be annoying. This is where we are. In fact, I think I may have been angry with her one time in my whole entire life. I just can't get mad at her. It's the darndest thing!

I wish I could write about her better. Some topics are too close to my heart to give them justice. Let me say it this way: I trust no one more. Find comfort and solace in her words. Feel warmth and affection for her family (her own children & husband as well as her parents and siblings) like I do for my own. Treasure our time together. Find an independence in spirit and mind - an openness in opinion and a value in thought. Have a gratitude for her friendship that is so deep - at times I feel inadequate to have such a wonderful friend.

By far the best thing Heather has given me is a voice. She listens. She listened as a teenage girl. I slowly felt less angry, less frustrated more appreciated. That in itself is priceless. Without it I would have withered and died.

Heather - I sure do love you! You know you'll always be the loveseat to my couch! Thanks for being the bestest friend in the whole wide world!!!