What's In a Name?

So ... the question on so many people's brains lately is "Are you divorced yet?" 

The answer is "Yes."  I'm so private about this.  I really don't like to talk about it.  I think this is a respect issue.  I respect Tracy.  I respect our role as parents.  This is personal - and private.

What isn't private is what's out there.  What's out there is my name.  I have gone back to being "Glenda Miller".  Why?

This is an interesting issue for women.  I had some strong opinions about name changing while I was married.  It always bothered me when women would keep their maiden name.  I mean it bothered me.  I saw/see it as a lack of commitment.  I may be more convinced of that now.  Changing your name changes your life.  New driver's license, new name on utilities, credit cards, bank accounts.  It's HUGE!  And it's a pain.  Anyway, I went round and round about this in my mind before making a decision. 

Initially I wanted to keep "Montierth" so I would have the same last name as my children.  Makes sense.  They've been through enough.  Why further confuse them with Mom having a different name?  Then again, half their family has that name.  It isn't unfamiliar.  I'm still "Mom" to them. 

I started thinking of the future.  Eventually, my name will change again.  When that happens, would it appear to further sever my connection to my kids (in their eyes) if I went from "Montierth" to "X"?  Would they view Mr. X as pushing them away from their Mom in a very figurative way?  I didn't want that for the future Mr. X.  When he comes on the scene, I want every positive to be available.  I want to show my kids that any future relationship I have is about me being happy, not being separated from them.

It may appear as if I over think things.

Regardless of my personal anxiety, my decision was made.  I would change my name back to "Miller".  At least my monogram remains the same.

The question on many people's minds:  "How did the kids take it?"  Well, they seemed to think it made sense.  I made sure to emphasize that they shouldn't harbor any anxiety around it.  Especially hit home the idea that if I am referred to as "Mrs. Montierth" or "Glenda Montierth" it's just fine.  I won't get upset or openly correct anyone.  This little reassurance produced sighs of relief.

What's in a name?  I'm not so sure who this Glenda Miller chick is going to turn out to be, but so far she's doing alright.